Why I need a new job

I can't even wear jeans on Fridays. Bummer! But here's the best part: by donating $3 to the United Way campaign I can get a "Denim Day" sticker that will allow me to wear them tomorrow. But you knew there'd be a catch! From a corporate email:

What is work-appropriate denim? All denim should be clean, gently-worn and pressed. You also can wear athletic footwear, such as tennis shoes. Please make sure your footwear is also clean.

Uh, no, I didn't buy a sticker, too much pressure. :-)